Congress collapses from exhaustion after doing its job - Chevy Impala SS Forum
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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-01-2013, 11:36 AM Thread Starter
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Congress collapses from exhaustion after doing its job

December 31, 2012
CONGRESS COLLAPSES FROM EXHAUSTION AFTER DOING JOB

POSTED BY ANDY BOROWITZ

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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—The House of Representatives adjourned this evening after the legislative body collapsed from exhaustion brought on by hours of doing its job.

Hundreds of congressmen complained of headaches, dizzy spells, and extreme fatigue after putting in what sources called “a six, maybe seven-hour day.”

With the nation headed over the fiscal cliff, there was no indication when Congress might reconvene, since many of its members had to be hospitalized after what was described as their near-total physical meltdown.

According to Dr. Davis Logsdon of the University of Minnesota Medical School, “Being forced to listen, compromise, and act like adults for minutes at a time was more punishing than these people could bear.”

Dr. Logsdon said that the gruelling ordeal of doing their jobs would likely keep members of Congress in the hospital for weeks.

“I don’t see these people getting back to work until February at the earliest,” he said. “And that’s great news for this country. Happy New Year, America.”

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Photograph by J. Scott Applewhite/AP.




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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-01-2013, 12:25 PM
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Great stuff! Thanks

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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-01-2013, 05:51 PM
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After that they all went to the movies, had dinner, and retreated to their swanky hotels with their respective corporate masters to continue fellating them for more lobby money while the People continue to get screwed.

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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-01-2013, 06:47 PM
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true that....

hopefully, the Congress will vote no and go home...

at least then there will be actual spending cuts - that they all voted for 2 years ago...

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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-01-2013, 07:20 PM Thread Starter
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I agree, I just thought this was too funny to not pass on.


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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-01-2013, 07:49 PM
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Unbelievable. These phucs were unable to resolve anyting for months on end. And now they're exhausted. Only in America. The founding fathters are spinning in their graves right about now.

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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-02-2013, 11:43 AM
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Unbelievable... I'm moving to canada.

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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-05-2013, 08:52 AM
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-06-2013, 04:49 PM
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o-bama!!!


(how the hell do I type in ALL caps ?!)

Last edited by 95_9C1; 01-06-2013 at 04:49 PM. Reason: (how the hell do I type in ALL caps ?!)
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 01-06-2013, 06:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 95_9C1 View Post
o-bama!!!


(how the hell do I type in ALL caps ?!)
I dunno man, it automatically changes it whenever I try to do all caps too. Lame-o!

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1980 Buick Century Wagon - Project Dark Horse.
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1987 Chevrolet Caprice 9C1 - Sold when I first joined the forums, and now I've got her back. Mostly stock, with a new Flintstones floor courtesy of Maine winters.

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