OK. Being one of the original members of the Impala SS club from 1996, I've seen, heard and done many things. Some smart, some not so much.
Here are my thoughts. My assumption is that you are NOT a "Cost is no issue" person, but one like who wants bang for the buck.
!. 4.10 rear gears may be an option, but find one of the free calculators on the web, enter your total tire diameter and figure our your RPMs at driving speed and determine what you're willing to sacrifice in gas mileage for off the line performance.
2. Heads. If you can find a Camaro/Corvette/Firebird aluminum heads for cheap it's an option but I would put it low on the list. I would FIRST opt for the 1.6/1 ratio rockers. Youtube probably has videos, and there are tons of forum posts. 1.6 rocker and cheap and easy HP.
3. Throttle body. Don't bother. Don't listen to the hype. Until you're pulling 383 or more cubes, it's a waste to time. Joh Moss, who developed the Impala SS ran a stone-ass stock throttle body on a 400+hp engine. Opt for the Firebird/Camaro Mass Air Flow Sensor and delete the intake side 'screen'. Worth 3-4hp for low bux.
4.Get one of the many fresh air intakes. I have the RAISSE intake. Clear Image Automotive makes a version:
High Performance Exhaust Systems - Chevy Impala SS Cold Air Intake
5.Don't bother with connecting rods. Waste of money unless you're building a killer engine
6. Cam. There are ton of options and I would do the above FIRST and then talk to some tech folks at some cam vendors for their thoughts.
7. Several reputable maker make good headers. Clear Image makes a good set. Pypes exhaust makes a good, well built set of exhaust pipes with a crossover. Get the Turbo Pro mufflers.don't get the race pro. you'll hate me. There are other alternative exhaust systems that are good as well. Ask questions an make your own decision.
8.Check in with Hotchkis Engineering and avail yourself of the complete set of their goods. Get a set of Bilstein shocks. Get a giant set of Wilwood/TCE front rotors to go with those huge wheels.
I've done this for 25 years. I'm not the be-al end-all expert in all things, but I know what I've done that has worked. I'm also willing to speak to you on the phone, if you'd like to have a conversation at length.
You have a beautiful car so far! Congratulations on that. People who don't know 'old' cars have NO IDEA what it takes to keep a car that good looking for that long! Be happy to speak any time. Just PM me.